the only thing

"should i tear my eyes out now?
everything i see returns to you somehow
should i tear my heart out now?
everything i feel returns to you somehow"

-sufjan

your waterfalls

Tonight, it was stormy, and there was a tornado warning (luckily, there did not end up being a tornado) but during that time, I wrote this song in the room in my basement where I play guitar. The lyrics come primarily from Psalm 42, and some of Psalm 40. It's about some of the things I've been learning lately- mainly, that I'm not in control, and that I can trust God with everything. He is all that we need!


My heart fails within me
As deep calls out to deep
In the roar of your waterfalls
It swept over me
Over me

By day the Lord directs His love
At night His song is with me-
A prayer to the God of my life,
O God my rock, why have you forgotten me?

Why must I go about mourning,
Oppressed by the enemy?
Why are you downcast, oh my soul?
God, won't you calm the storm in me?

Because my heart fails within me
As deep calls out to deep,
In the roar of your waterfalls
It swept over me

So I put my hope in you
I will wait patiently
Though the waves overwhelm me
You can calm the sea
My hiding place, my peace
I put my hope in you

I put my hope in you

May all those who seek you
Rejoice and be glad
And always cry out
"The Lord be exalted!"
But as for me
I am poor and needy.
You are strong, I am weak,
I will put my trust in you.

I put my trust in you

When my heart fails within me
As deep calls out to deep
And the roar of your waterfalls
Is crashing over me

I will lift my eyes,
I will wait patiently.
Though the waves overwhelm me,
You can calm the sea.
You're my hiding place, my peace
And everything I need,
I put my hope in you.

I put my hope in you.

Why are you downcast, oh my soul?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
For yet I will praise him,
Yet I will praise you,
My Savior, my God.

whatever is true

A song based on Philippians 4:4-8

Whatever is true

Whatever is noble

Whatever is right

Whatever is pure

Whatever is lovely

Whatever's admirable

If anything

Is excellent or praiseworthy

Think about such things

Rejoice in the Lord always

I will say it again rejoice

Do not be anxious

What I'm saying is

The Lord is good

And He hears my voice

Each situation

Prayer and petition

With thanksgiving present all your requests

To God above

And whatever is true

Whatever is noble

Whatever is right

Whatever is pure

Whatever is lovely

Whatever's admirable

If anything

Is excellent or praiseworthy

Think about such things

And the God of peace

Will be with you

Whatever is true

Rejoice in the Lord always

I will say it again, rejoice

Ain't got no worries

Though there's storms all around me

Your peace it comes

Drowns out the noise

Yeah, Your perfect peace

Passes understanding

And it'll guard my heart and mind

In Jesus Christ

So I will turn my mind

Away from all the lies

And to the holy one, the perfect love

Who casts out all my fear

And then I hear

Whatever is true

Whatever is noble

Whatever is right

Whatever is pure

Whatever is lovely

Whatever's admirable

If anything

Is excellent or praiseworthy

Think about such things

And the God of peace

Will be with you

Whatever is true

in sweet september

In sweet september

Repeat, remember

What's new, what's borrowed

What's true and true tomorrow

September air and autumn sun

The leaves will turn and colors run

She waited for some place to start

The colors ran off with her heart

And she knows how the seasons change

When only this hope remains

In sweet september

Repeat, remember

What's new, what's borrowed

What's true and true tomorrow

New beginnings, evening chill

Looking for some space to fill

She wanted sunshine, wanted cold

Something young and something old

And all things soon will grow cold and die

Still she knows what it is to be alive

In sweet september

Repeat, remember

What's new, what's borrowed

What's true and true tomorrow

In sweet september

Fires burn to embers

Softly, and fading

Love what's remaining

here

Again
I've reached another end
Where once I called you friend
It always seems to slip away

Goodbye
You'll never see me cry
Beneath a diamond sky
My armor for the lonely fight

I am cold
Can you hear?
I will fly with no hope
No fear*
Into the night
My silent tears
No one sees me here
No one sees me here

Hello
The wind begins to blow
A sun turned into snow
But you will never know

I am cold
Can you hear?
I will fly with no hope
No fear
Into the night
My silent tears
No one sees me here
No one sees me here

I am cold
But You are near
Beneath Your wings
All the world comes clear
You're in my night
You dry my tears
You've always been here
You've always been here

*some lyrics taken from Twenty One Pilots

a million stars

Surrounded by your beauty
Memories fade
Fragments gleam and captivate
Jagged pieces all reflect Your face
This pile of broken dreams
Will shout Your praise

And like a million stars
I'm still searching for my place to shine
I'm burning in the sky for You
Chasing colors through the night
We'll find our way to a sunrise
Where the sky is new
Let me rest in You

And like a million scars
Trace their marks to form the outline
Of a love that burns inside for you
Gather stones before the light
Carries them far with the morning tide
And you can't see through
Then I'll look to You

what will i consider?

This song is based on Psalm 77, one of my favorite psalms in which Asaph speaks of a time when he doubted the goodness and love of God and cried out to Him. He was in great distress and speaks of his spirit growing faint and his refusal to be comforted. Yet there is a transition in verse 10, where Asaph decided to turn His focus away from His circumstances and the pain he was feeling and look to God. He meditated on all God had done in the past, in creation and miracles and leading His people, and the ways He had proven Himself trustworthy, always keeping His promises, and rejoiced in these things, in God's amazing power and grace. Through this remembrance and turning His focus away from himself and looking to God, Asaph came to an attitude of praise for how awesome God is, viewing his struggles in the light of God's amazing power and goodness.


The waters saw you God
Saw you and convulsed
So why can't I hear you now?
Where are those days of old?

For my spirit now grows faint
But you made the earth tremble and quake
Through the waters, paths created
Where is that power today?
Have your promises failed?
The darkness makes me afraid
Could your love be real?

What will I consider
In the dark of night?
And who will I remember
When hope has fled my sight?

~

To this I will appeal
Your word you've revealed
And when I am afraid
I see your power displayed

In the years of the right hand of the most high
I see your works in the past and in my life
I meditate on your mighty deeds
Your way, oh Lord, is holy
You are a God of wonders
Your works I will remember

When I'm troubled, and I cannot speak
And I wonder if your steadfast love has ceased
I see this life that you've redeemed in your great love
And set me free

And the years of the right hand of the most high
Show me your power and your greatness through all of time
Oh I will lift my eyes
And praise Him, forever glorified!
Proven to be trustworthy
My God, you are enough for me

So help me lift my eyes to see
Turn my thoughts away from me
Your goodness and your grace I'll sing
Oh Lord, you can do anything
And through the pain and suffering
My God, you are enough for me

how i need you

In Christ alone by Your grace I come
Humbly before You
Clothed in His righteousness and Your love
You make me new

With nothing to offer You
Nothing to boast
But empty hands and a heart of stone
I walked in death
Deserving Your wrath
You made me alive in Your great love

And I worship You
You are holy, strong and mighty
Give everything to You
I am Yours
Though I'm frail and weak
You are everything I need
And oh, how I need You

It does not, therefore depend on my own desire or effort
But on Your mercy
That You might display Your power in me
And that Your name might be proclaimed in all the earth

You give Your Spirit as a seal that can't be broken
Nullified or stolen
And I know nothing can ever snatch me from Your hands
In life or death, height or depth
Or anything else in all creation

And I worship You
You are holy, strong and mighty
Give everything to You
I am Yours
Though I'm frail and weak
You are everything I need
And oh, how I need You

In Christ alone by Your grace I come
Humbly before You
Clothed in His righteousness and Your love
You've made me new

teach me how to sing

For Kortney...


She sings her favorite melody
With a voice big as the sea
Like pure water, clear and strong
The waves in her heart form a song

She wonder if she'll ever fly
Lately her head's been in the sky
Do you know how bright you shine?
You make me smile on the inside

And way up high in your castle on a cloud
In paradise though I don't know how
When night grows darker, you smile brighter
And it makes no sense to me
When you teach me how to sing

You are my laughter every day
The silly things you do and say
While the love you never found
Makes you strain to hear the sound

Of songs that beckon you to sleep
Wide awake in restless dreams
When your world is crumbling
You can hold on to me

And way up high in your castle on a cloud
It hurts to hide when it gets too loud
When night grows darker, you smile brighter
And it makes no sense to me
When you teach me how to sing

Will you teach me how to sing?

The songs now beckon you to sleep
Feel the summer ocean breeze
When your castles fall apart
May I hold your heart?

psalm 27

The Lord is my light and my salvation
Whom shall I fear
When He is the stronghold of my life?

The Lord is my light and my salvation
Whom shall I fear
When He is the stronghold of my life?

One thing I ask of the Lord
This is what I seek
Above all else

That all the days of my life
I would dwell with Him
Here in His house

For He will keep me safe in His dwelling
My refuge and my rock
And I will gaze upon His beauty

Yes, in the day of trouble I'll be singing
With shouts of joy
I will make music to the Lord

(Repeat song)